Monday, December 28, 2009

Hello, "Not me!" Monday.

I definately did not eat pie for breakfast the past 3 mornings... and then wonder why I have not lost any more weight. That would be counter-productive. (and delicious)

I did not schedule my night last night around the new episode of "Keeping up with the Kardashians" just to see if Khloe really was pregnant. & Then I did not have tears in my eyes when I figured out she had an early miscarriage. I am not that obsessed with celebrities. (It really was sad... sorry for the spoiler)

I did not skip on doing chores around the house this morning to facebook chat with a couple of my long-lost (and very missed) friends. I would never be so careless with household duties. (It was nice to catch up. Great, actually. Went perfectly with my 5,647,564 calorie pie)

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Have yourself a merry little Christmas...

"Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect."
~ Oren Arnold

"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas... perhaps... means a little bit more."
~ Dr. Seuss

"Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we're here for something else besides ourselves."
~ Eric Sevareid


Wordless Wednesday

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

HAPPY 5 MONTH-DAY, Sweet Cheeks!!

My sweet angel is 5 months old today... and just as adorable as ever!

Monday, December 21, 2009

For the 1st time ever.... "Not me!" Monday.

I did not get *slightly* jealous seeing all of the snow on the east coast this week. I would never wish for such a thing. Nope, Not me!

I did not answer the door wearing a nightgown (with messy bed-head hair & morning breath) when the DirectTv guy showed up today. I would never be so careless as to not be presentable when company arrived, and I certainly would never sleep through my alarm (only to be woken up by the annoying doorbell). Not me!

I did not spend $75 on 4 pictures of my Sweet Cheeks. I am not that obsessed with my sweet little guy. That's clearly WAAAAY too much money for 4 pictures.

I did not offer to make Mr B coffee today just because I wanted some. I would never hide my own wants behind a mask of kindness for others. Not me!

I most certainly did not watch the entire first season of Laguna Beach on this week. I would never waste my time watching a drama-filled show with a bunch of teenagers as the cast. Obviously this would be a huge waste of time and I have better time management skills that that. I would never waste precious time watching old reality shows.... Nope.. Not me!

I did not squeal in delight when Mr B bought me Philosophy Creme Brulee shampoo. I also did not immediately run to the shower to wash my hair. I would never get as giddy as a school girl with a crush over shampoo. No, Not me!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Today I am thankful for:

A- Antiques.

B- Bon Jovi - One of my all time fave bands.

C- Cheesecake... makes any day a good day.

D- Dior lip gloss. Diet cherry coke. Daisies.

E- Electricity.

F- Family & Friends.

G- Glitter.

H- Home... With my 2 favorite boys :)& Happily ever afters.

I- Ice cream.

J- Jam.

K- Kittens. Kites.

L- Love. Laughter.

M- Mr B. Manicures.

N- New beginnings.

O- Oxiclean... Without it, my life would contain many more stains.

P- Popsicles. PINK!. Pedicures.

Q- Quiznos... Nothing better than a warm sub on a cold day!

R- Real housewives of _______. :) (Any season!)

S- Sweet cheeks... My precious baby.

T- Target.

U- Umbrellas with polka dots.

V- Violets.

W- Watermelon. Water fountains.

X- XM radio.

Y- YouTube.

Z- Zappos - Shoe shopping with free shipping! Perfection!

Love at first sight? Absolutely!

::SWOON:: I am positive Sweet cheeks needs one of these for Christmas. From Santa, of course!

Here's the site if you love them as much as I do:

Monday, November 16, 2009

All my love. All my life.

"We Weren’t born to follow
Come on and get up off your knees
When life is a bitter pill to swallow
You gotta hold on to what you believe
Believe that the sun will shine tomorrow
And that your saints and sinners bleed
We weren’t born to follow
You gotta stand up for what you believe
Bon Jovi

Dear SC,

It has been almost 4 months since you came into our lives. It seems like so long ago & just like yesterday all at the same time. You are the greatest joy in my life and I can only hope that you always feel that... From the top of your head to the ends of your toes. There is nothing that you will do in my lifetime to make me love you any less than I do now. But, Sweet cheeks, there are some things I feel I should tell you.

People will let you down. By letting people get close to you, close enough to see what's really in your heart, you take the chance on getting hurt. As much as I want to hold you close and to shelter you from the world, I know that one day someone is going to let you down. It will hurt me just as much as it will hurt you, my sweet boy. You'll find that most friendships do not last forever, and if you get truely lucky you will find one love that will last a lifetime. Those are going to be hard lessons to learn. You may be sad, or angry, or bitter. Those feelings are normal. Allow yourself to feel them for a short time and then decide to move on. It's ok to mourn the loss, but it's also important to not let it consume your life. There are so many amazing things out there to spend your life enjoying. Try not to let the negative things water down the amazing things.

There are good people out there, but they are hard to come by. When you find one, hold on tight and don't let go. Be a good person, and good people will surround you. Be a man of honesty & integrity because in the end, how you have conducted yourself will be what allows you to sleep peacefully at night.

The secret to getting through life with few scars is faith. Faith gives you hope and security. Faith will allow you to make the right decisions. Find faith in a higher power, and allow it to follow you all of your days.

I hope and also fear that you'll learn these lessons. Daddy and I will always be here for you. We are here with open arms. When you feel unsure of the world and scared of all that's around, know that my love surrounds you and your faith will guide you.

All my love. All my life.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Happy Veterans Day, y'all.

Thank you so much to all who have served - Past & Present. <3

Some people live an entire lifetime and wonder if they have ever made a difference in the world, but the soldiers don't have that problem. ~Ronald Reagan

“Without the brave efforts of all the soldiers, sailors, airmen, and marines and their families, this Nation, along with our allies around the world, would not stand so boldly, shine so brightly and live so freely.” ~Lane Evans

Monday, November 9, 2009

Today I choose to be Thankful.

Today I can be discouranged by the things I do not have & have not accomplished, OR I can be thankful for the blessings I do have.

I am thankful for...

*I am thankful for a soft place to lay my head at night.
*I am thankful for the loving man who lays next to me.
*I am thankful for a healthy, happy, thriving baby.
*I am thankful for having an abundance of food in my pantry.
*I am thankful for my family.
*I am thankful for my friends.
*I am thankful for sunshine. & rain.
*I am thankful for my car. Eventhough it needs some work done. & Eventhough it will be expensive.
*I am thankful for pink daisies.
*I am thankful for unanswered prayers.
*I am thankful for hot chocolate on cold days.
*I am thankful for my furbabies.

... And the picture that inspired this post & put my life into perspective...

I do have a "crunchy" side!

I do have a "crunchy" side. But, it's usually hidden beneath my love for over-priced plastic baby items & disposible diapers.

Yesterday, I began making baby food! So far, I have spent $7 and made around 200 baby food "cubes". (The pureed food is frozen in ice cube trays) Each cube = 1oz. A 4-6 month old baby will eat apx. 2-4oz of baby food per day. That means if sweet cheeks eats 4 oz of food every day, we will have enough food for 50 days. Not only is this a much healthier option, it's also much cheaper!

We have decided to do a modified feeding schedule. The one we chose introduces a few foods at 4-6 months, and then a bunch of new foods for 6-8 months.

Here's our list:

4-6 Months:

CEREALS - Rice, Barley, Oatmeal
FRUITS - Apple, Banana, Pear
VEGGIE - Butternut Squash, Sweet Potato, Green Beans

Since I forgot to take pictures, here are a couple from the web for those who are curious.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Today is a sad day.

“How do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?”
- Calvin & Hobbes

Today is one of those days that makes you want to hold those you love a little bit closer, a little bit tighter, & a little bit longer.

Right now, I am sitting in my chair, with misty eyes, watching CNN. There has been a horrible tragedy at Ft Hood, TX today. This news causes my heart to skip a beat because that is where my brother is currently stationed. My heart goes out to those who have lost a loved one day. Thankfully, we did not lose a family member. D remained safe and sound during the shootings.

If you have an extra prayer, please say one for my brother as his base recovers from the horrible events that have just occurred.

Since the news story is still breaking, there are not a lot of details that have been released. So far we know that there were 3 shooters, 31 people have been injured and 12 have been killed.

A BIG THANK YOU to everyone in the Military, past and present, for your dedication and all that you do. You sacrifice daily for our country without giving it a second thought. You do so much that "Thank you" doesn't seem sufficient. It really is appreciated even if the appreciation is not vocalized often enough.


Sunday, November 1, 2009

Let's get down to the heart of the matter

Let's go to a place I didn't think I would ever be able to go.

Let alone on a PUBLIC Internet blog.

Post Partum Depression.

Those are the 3 scariest words I have ever had to face. Just looking at them now, all typed out, in black and white, is making me tear up. It is only now, coming out on the other side, that I feel like I can address it. I've spent the past 2 months embarrassed, ashamed and terrified to admit this to anyone. Mr B knew, as well as a few close friends and family members... But even to those who knew, I never spoke about it. Not even to Mr B.

I never wanted to be the poster child for PPD. I never wanted to have it, and once I did have it, I wanted to deny it. I tried to run & hide from it. Eventually I had to seek help and take medicine. I feel better now. I feel like the rain clouds have lifted and I can finally enjoy this adventure called motherhood.

I felt OK for the first 4-5 weeks after my son was born. I thought that meant I was "In the clear". I patted myself on the back, and thought I was one of the lucky ones. Then I hit week 5. That was the week I became a crying, hysterical, angry mess. That was the week that I realized I was scared of a 10 pound baby. That was the week that EVERYTHING Mr B did annoyed me.

I felt like I was in WAYYYY over my head. I thought I had made a mistake. I had second thoughts and doubts about being a mother. I had a raw gut-wrenching pain in my stomach. I knew something didn't "feel right"... But, in my mind it was because of the lack of sleep, the infant who cried all night, or my new stretched-out-deflated stomach. I didn't want to believe that it was PPD. I had convinced myself that I would not get this horrible monster of an illness. One day Mr B sat me down and explained in his nurse voice that this was PPD. I needed to seek help. I needed to get help for myself, and also so that I would be a better wife and mother. He never told me I was a "bad mom", although I felt it in my heart. He stuck by me, holding my hand... offering a shoulder... and encouraging me.

I yelled. I cried. I denied. I was bitter. I was angry. I broke down. I said I hated him for this. I wanted to hate him for throwing this in my face.... That was the illness taking over. PPD was not how I expected it to be. I was OK for about 80% of the day. It was the other 20% of the day that was hard. That was when the emotions kicked in and nothing could satisfy me. I felt crazy. Surely no sane person could go from crying hysterically, with blood shot eyes, to sullen and quiet, and back to happy in a matter of minutes.

Finally... Here we are 2 months later, and I feel like I am starting to get back to "me". This baby thing doesn't seem quite so overwhelming.

I finally feel OK. I finally feel like this manageable, even enjoyable. It was a long road, with a rocky path, but in the end I made it out alright... with a smile on my face and love in my heart. <3

Saturday, October 31, 2009

How about a little survey?

1. Were you married at the time?

2. What was your reaction when you found out you were pregnant?
Shock. Fear. Elation. Mr B and I had been trying to have a baby for a year and a half or so before I saw those magical 2 pink lines, so at first I did not believe it. I was sick at the time, and Mr B suggested I take a test before taking any medicine since "I was late". Yeah, I know... A week and a half late & 3 pregnancy tests later...Basically, I just needed to be slapped in the face with it.

3. How old were you?

4. How did you find out you were pregnant?
I peed on a stick Nov 2008, And had it confirmed at Planned Parenthood a few days later.

5. Who did you tell first?
Mr B. He was sitting in the next room. I walked in crying & shaking. I couldn't catch my breath so I just handed him the test.

6. Did you want to find out the sex?
Yes! Unfortch, that didn't work in our favor. We were told "Girl - 95% sure!!" in February, and then "Boy - 100% sure!!" In May.

7. Due date?

Either July 8Th or the 17Th depending on which ultrasound you go by.

8. Did you deliver early or late?

9. Did you have morning sickness?
Yes. I got out of the house a total of 4 times in December. That's it. I threw up all day every day. I was finally put on medicine to keep the nausea at bay - It worked "fair". I was still sick with the meds.

10. What did you crave?

Everything. My favorites were bacon & mustard sandwiches, cereal, banana peppers & slushees (Coke flavored from Kum & go). (Not all together!)

11. What irritated you the most?
When people would say either "You're so BIG!!!" (Uhm, yes. I feel like a whale. Thank you.) Or, "Sleep while you can". (Sure, I'll bank my sleep and cash it in when I need it. Thank you.)

12. What was your first child’s sex?


13. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy?
Oh, dear. Almost 50. Five. Zero.

14. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy?
Just swelling & water retention.

15. Where did you give birth?
SJ Hospital

16. How many hours were you in labor?

17. Who drove you to the hospital?
Mr B. I was induced, so we knew the day & time.

18 . Did you take medicine to ease the pain?
I had an epidural when I got to 4-5 cm. It was HEAVEN.

19 . How much did your child weigh?
9 lbs, 4 oz

20 . What did you name him/her?
Sweet cheeks :)

21 . How old is your first born today?
3 months

22. Who does your child look like?
It depends on the day. He's a good mix of both of us.

23. Did you get mad at your husband during labor?
No, he was amazing.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Dear customer service lady at Wal-Mart

Dear customer service lady at Wal-Mart who stared at her nails the entire time I was talking,

Otherwise known as "Patsy", or so your name tag with smiley face said.

I realize that you think I am slightly ridiculous for wanting to exchange infant formula this afternoon. Yes, I know, to you "Natural cultures" & "Protect plus" are the same thing. But, they actually are not. If they were, Good Start would save the money and just make one label instead of the two separate ones. I did not appreciate your condescending voice when you stated that "Wal-Mart does not do returns or exchanges on baby formula".

Uhm, Your manager seemed to believe other wise. I would not have had to get your manager involved if you would have stepped down off of your power trip for 2 seconds and made the exchange yourself. You see, I was serious when I said "Your answer doesn't work for me. Please find someone who will have the answer I want. Which is, YES."

I see your eye roll and death glare & I raise you a hair flip.

Mrs B


Friday, October 23, 2009

a day late & a dollar short

I stole this from a dear friend of mine. She has a son who shares a birthday with Sweet cheeks. I call them Birthday Besties.

Age - 3 months

Weight - 16 lbs

Height - 26 inches

Sleeping habit - He usually falls asleep around 6pm, wakes up at 1am for 2oz of milk, the back to sleep until 5-7am.

Eating habits - During the day he eats every 2.5-3 hours (4oz), then 6 oz of cereal (oatmeal) at 5 pm before bed. He drinks Goodstart Protect Plus.

Cutest Moment of the Week - Watching Sweet cheeks and Mr B "talk" in the wee hours of the morning

Milestones - He's trying to figure out how to be a baby on the move!

Firsts - He fell asleep on his own for the 1st time this week. No mommy. No bottle. No rocking chair. Just Sweet cheeks and a blanket on the floor.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

a Daddy fail

Today is one of those pretty fall days that make you want to sit on the porch swing with a mug of hot chocolate and a good book. But, since I have a napping infant and a dishwasher full of clean dishes that need to be put into the cabinets, it will have to wait.

Mr B had his first (of many to come) Daddy fail. He turned the corner, to an oblivious baby, and said "Boo". This resulted in a fit of screams, a bottle, a long rock in the chair with Mommy.... and finally.......

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Blog #1.

Since Sweet cheeks is the love of my life & the inspiration for my blog, This one is dedicated to him. My son.

Dear Sweet Cheeks,
My sweet baby boy! I wish you a lifetime of happiness and good fortune. I also wish you a handful of humbling experiences... Experiences that will bring you to your knees and make you a stonger person. I hope you always know how much daddy and I love you, how long we prayed for you and how complete you make our lives.

Help someone if you are able. Remember the compliments you recieve and forget the negative remarks. Pray. Save your extra money and invest wisely. Keep your word. Be honest and straight forward. Don't accept 2nd best - from yourself or from others. Don't take the easy road simply because it's faster. Live a life of integrity and courage. Stand up for the wronged. Never compromise your morals. Remember that nothing comes free. Do the things that frighten you. Own your actions and apologize when you hurt someone. Explore as much of the world as you can. Experience everything.

I will always be here for you. I will always hope for you, dream for you, fight for you... love you.